To celebrate (it was actually completely unrelated; like we need an excuse to go out to eat), we met my parents at Kiha of Japan for dinner Friday night. Then we headed over to the our lot to kick around ideas about trees and take some Before pictures.
In this last picture, we're standing where the front door will eventually be!
I've been unsettled for months (years) about building this house. The financial freedom we've felt with no mortgage has been powerful. It's made me drag my feet about floor plans and plead with God for clear direction. Should we invest money, time, and effort--our lives--in this? But God's been quiet on the subject, or I haven't been listening. I've gotten only one clear answer about the house, and that was that God's presence will be what makes our house; that it's not about square footage or layout or neighborhood.
So to sign those papers was part intertia, part step of faith, which didn't click until now, a week later. And which explains my nerves at closing. Taking this step, with neither affirmation nor obstacle as guidance, feels overly risky.
As my wise husband said a few weeks ago, when we were waffling again about whether to do this thing or buy a cheap little house and give the balance to the church, we're going to hold it loosely. Either path, held loosely, because to follow God's will for our lives means abandoning the sensible course of action whenever he calls for it. Hearing no call to retreat from this house, we're proceeding. And, while we intend for this to be our forever home, I'm already reminding myself that we can sell it at any time. Any. Time.
Until then, we're going to enjoy this! Watching something come out of the ground is great fun, especially when you get to pick all the stuff that goes in it. (Please remind me of this when we're bickering about carpet, or cabinets, or colors.) We're going to try to use what God's given us wisely, to build a sanctuary for his presence, a place where his Kingdom exists here in Greensboro, for our community and friends and family. We're going to run after this, but we're going to hold it loosely.
